A bit of this and that...with added frangipani.

Wednesday, August 18, 2010

When does it become too personal?

I have been reading a few different blogs recently, and have come to realise that mine is missing a little something. Sometimes it seems flippant and kind of shallow. That's OK, because that is sometimes how I feel, but every now and then I would like to do a post that is real.

I haven't yet figured out where the line is however. Where is the line between being 'real' and being one of those people that go off and have a deep and meaningful conversation with someone whilst the party rages around them? Where is the line between a blog and a diary? What is appropriate?

I don't know.

What I do know is that my heart is aching right now for my Dad who is very ill. I am frustrated that I can't be there to comfort him and give him a big hug. I am also frustrated that I can't write about it. It is too raw, and it's too personal.

I might write it anyway and keep it for me.

So what do you think? Where do you draw the line with what you will share? What do you consider to be too personal or 'too much information'?


  1. I think you and only you can draw the line on when your blog is too personal for you to write about. I kinda learned this the hard way. When I first started blogging I vented (hard) about my husband on my blog. My mom read it (probably the only person to) and called me. She did not like the details I had gone into and reminded me that whatever I write someday my young children could read. Since then, I still write about personal stuff, but I do draw a line. But on twitter ... man I let it all out LOL! Nice to meet you!

    Praying for you and your dad.

  2. I think it is a personal decision to be made by each and every blogger. I've come across some seriously racy, foul-mouthed blogs. To each his own. It is not for me.

  3. What I think and what my husband thinks is personal can be quite different. I've had to take a step back on more than a few occasions because of potential embarrassment. And since I use my real name (wish I hadn't)I have to worry about future ramifications.

    I am sorry to hear about your dad Shelly, and hope things go well. Sometimes distance can make things much worse than they are, so hang in there, okay?

  4. I think that line is different for everyone. I don't actually feel that I share that much - but I could share a lot...and I may. I hold back because the things I have to talk about would probably upset my mom. I've actually posted some stuff anonymously on some other people's blogs...but it didn't feel the same to me.

    I think you need to do what feels right to you though. Not every blog needs to be deep and overly emotional. It's just like not every movie or book needs to be that way. Something for everyone.

    I'm so sorry to hear about your father. Being so far away has to be terribly difficult in that situation.

  5. Hmmmm, this is a good question and only one that each person can answer for herself. While I do talk about personal details of my life (both past and present), I don't go into such details which could lead to family issues. Like I could go and on about my in-laws but I refrain out of respect for them. I'd hate for them to stumble upon my blog one day and be offended.

    I'm sorry about your dad. I can only imagine how difficult it is for you.

  6. Your blog is not lacking anything! It's lovely just the way it is.
    But good question...how much is too much?
    I say just write what you want to write, if you want to publish, then publish...if not it's fine to let it all out and then keep it for yourself.
    I usually share on my blog what I would say if I was sitting around with a group of friends.
    So sorry to hear your dad is not well. xx

  7. Honey - I've never thought of your blog as shallow! Not for one second.

    Write what you're comfortable with, and don't be too concerned about what everyone else is doing. I think the minute you blog to please others, it just won't work. Please yourself. People will connect - they just want to see 'you'.


  8. Thank you everyone for the comments. It seems unanimous, the line is where we want to draw it.

    Christy, thanks for coming by and I'm pleased to meet you too. I have been around to visit yours.

    HT (Life is...), I know what you mean. To each her own.

    Thea, I like the way you do it, imagine yourself chatting with a group of friends. That seems a gauge I am comfortable with.

    Helene, it can sometimes seem if we are dodging landmines, especially as I have shared my blog with most of my family and friends and who are we going to write about except for them?

    Jodie, now I feel like that person that puts herself down so that everyone will say, "Oh, don't be silly! You're not fat/ugly/whatever". It wasn't my intention to fish for compliments, but thanks for your kind words just the same.

    Marilyn, I think you are right. It isn't as cathartic if you vent anonymously. That is a good analogy, blogs are like movies, some are comedies, dramas or documentaries. Mine is a little of everything depending on how I feel, and I have been feeling pretty great lately, so feeling so sad has thrown me for a loop! Haven't had any real life crises happen since I started my blog.

    Thanks for all the well wishes for Dad. I am trying to think positively, because I know he is.

  9. i love your blog just the way it is ;-) I also vent ,and everything else on my blog. I dont care who read it if they dont like it i say move on NEXT LOL... i write what i feel at the time etc...
    HUGS for yor dad hun ;-)

  10. Make your own rules. To each his own. I find that I learn about myself through writing, my writing improves the more I write, and then if I share it, well I'm connecting with others out there who may have felt the same way.


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