A bit of this and that...with added frangipani.

Friday, June 3, 2011

Slow and Steady Finishes the Race, Late and Distracted Stuffs It Up

Day Before Race Day

4:45 pm Ow! Ow! Ow! I twisted my ankle walking down the driveway. I hope that I will still be able to finish the Fun Run tomorrow. I've already paid the registration fee and I have committed, in a blog post, to doing the race, so I really need to run this race. (I am just establishing my reasons early in case I end up being the last person to cross the finish line tomorrow. If this should happen, you'll know that it is because I was suffering from an excruciating debilitating injury.)

6 pm I told Will that I twisted my ankle. I said that it was OK to put weight on, but it really hurt when I tried to rotate my ankle. His response was to tell me to stop rotating my ankle. Helpful. Not.

Race Day

6:50 am I got up early, because I couldn't sleep. I did some work on the computer, because I knew that I wouldn't be able to get to it until later in the day due to the race. Time started to get away from me. I needed to get going as I had to be in town by 7:30 am.

7:27 am Was chuffed that I made it to the meeting point with 3 minutes to spare...

Just then, the starter pistol went off and throngs of runners were bowling me over.

I couldn't believe they'd started already! I thought there would be time for registration before the race! I thought maybe there'd even be time for a coffee and a muffin! I was starving.

7:30 am* Found the registration table after asking three different people. The person manning the table told me that I was late. No kidding. I asked if I could please have my number. She said that I would never catch up with the race. I said I didn't care, that I just wanted to complete the race. She begrudgingly gave me my number and then told me that I wasn't allowed on the racecourse until I had caught up with the rest of the runners. I would have to run along the Esplanade.

7:32 am Found the racecourse, but the public (non-runners) were using it as a thoroughfare, so sod it, I figured I would run along it also.

7:40 am Bloody Hell! My lungs were burning and my limbs were aching. This was a lot harder than my leisurely jogs in the morning. Having to catch up made me have to run so much faster than I was used to.

7:45 am The course was simply up the Esplanade and then back again. I saw the winner on his way back to the finish line.

7:50 am I was officially humiliated. I was lapped by a guy dressed as Spongebob Squarepants, a granny, a four-year-old and a mum with a pram, and I think she had stopped to change a nappy.

7:55 am There was a mixture of remarks as I brought up the rear and the other runners were lapping me.

"The finish line's THAT way!" Gee thanks.

"What? Are you doing the race again?"

And from someone nice in a Raggedy Ann red wig, "You're almost at halfway! Keep going!"

7:57 am Even the official at halfway couldn't help but take the mickey out of me, "You're going the wrong way."

Great. I knew I was last, but he didn't have to rub it in.

7:58 am The lady official at the turnaround point asked me if I was doing the race again. I just laughed nervously and told her I was a late starter.

7:59 am At least the way back was not as embarrassing. I started to catch up to the walkers and the small children.

8:15 am I could see the finish line! I wanted to stop at this point more than ever. I prayed that I wouldn't do a face plant in front of all the people at the finish line; my legs were so wobbly.

8:16 am There was some presenter giving high-fives to everybody as they crossed the finish line. He asked, "How does it feel?" I had to bite my tongue to stop myself from telling him exactly how it really felt. Instead I said a half-hearted, "Great."

I had a hard time cooling down. I must have really got my heartbeat up.

8:20 am After grabbing some water and my long awaited muffin from the complimentary breakfast table, I asked a lady standing off to the side if she would take a photo of me.
I really felt like Nora No-Friends being there on my own. I explained to the lady, unnecessarily, that my husband had to take the kids to school so I was here on my own. If she had let me carry on, I would have gone on to tell her that my friends (yes, I do have friends) weren't interested or capable of joining me. BFF's actual words were something along the lines of, "I would rather gouge my eyes out with a blunt stick than do a 5K run." Another friend has shattered her ankle in roller derby and my retired friend who actually likes running would never agree to it. She would have been leading the race and my snail's pace would never do.

Oh well, I was here to tick off another item from my bucket list. I completed the entire race running, not walking, and I actually didn't end up being last. Yay me!

On the way back to the car, I had to cross the road that had partitions all along it. It must have been the path for the first half of the race...

Wait a minute, I didn't remember coming this way when I did the race! It was then that the penny dropped. I had started the race at the finish line. I ran the entire first half of the race going the wrong way along the racecourse. All those people who were joking about my going the wrong way...weren't joking.

How embarrassment.

Digital Parents Blog Carnival
* Times from here are approximate, because I was too distracted by my humiliation to look at my watch.


  1. Oh wow...that is SO funny! I did my first 5K last September and I would have totally died if this had happened to me! Your friends all need to be ashamed of themselves for leaving you alone to do this! Congrats for finishing!

  2. Backwards or forwards, you still ran 5k and that's quite an achievement!

  3. She: To be fair, I didn't ask anybody to join me. I had made up my mind I was going to do it at the last minute, and I didn't really think ahead enough to realise that it might be nice to have someone there for support.

    My friend's comment was only when I mentioned my plans in passing. I am sure that if I was actually asking her to accompany she would have been far more polite in her refusal. ;-)

    In hindsight, I am glad that no one was there with me, because whoever joined me might not have been amused at being late and then being steered in the wrong direction by a hapless companion.

    Kara: Thanks! I try to look at it like that, I am just glad that the distances were relatively the same or I might have felt disappointed that I didn't actually complete the race as it was set out.

  4. He descuvierto tu blog y te saludo des de el otro lado del mundo.
    Si lo deseas te invito a visitar mi blog.

  5. Manoli: Gracias por su visita. He visitado su blog hoy también. Me gustó algunas de las fotos que tienes ahí.

    Saludos desde Australia

    (Traductor Google es mi amigo)

  6. Hehe, I love this story, Shelly, so funny.
    Good on you for completing it (and for being able to speak Spanish).

  7. Christie: Hehe, "Traductor Google es mi amigo" means Google Translate is my friend. I just looked up what I wanted to say and voila, my blog has become multilingual.

    Glad you enjoyed my tale. :)

  8. Oh, dear...I think it's the thought that counts!!

    Great post!

  9. OOps! At least you had a go!
    Jumping over from the Digital Paretns Bolg Carnival - I really enjoyed this - glad to have found you!

  10. OMG Shelly!!! I'm not laughing at you...oh OK I am really! But I think you are amazing for completing a 5k fun run!! Me? I'd rather gouge my eyes out with a blunt stick!! ;)

  11. Despite the gaff, I actually am quite chuffed with myself for doing it. I'm tempted to do it again this year, but starting at the right place, obviously!


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